An Interview with the Obsidian Quarry Shoyru

What is this “stuff” the mysterious Shoyru referenced in such a passionate yet enigmatic manner? With a plethora of obsidian available, does one more rock really make the difference? What secrets lie beneath the surface of Neopia, waiting to be unearthed?

I decided to track down this mysterious Shoyru to investigate. The result is the following interview:

Xilara: Hi, my name is –

Shoyru: Hey – you were the one that tried to take all the obsidian! Figures coming from a Pirate Draik: trying to loot all the rock, eh?

Xilara: The name’s Xilara. And no, I have no intentions to take any more of your obsidian. In fact, I don’t even know why I take it in the first place – it just clutters my inventory.

Shoyru: Well Xilara, I’d prefer if you’d be getting a move on then. We got some important business to get to in the Quarry.

Xilara: Really? Seems to me you got a bag packed over there as if you are done work for the day. Plans to travel around Neopia? Is this part of the important “stuff” you told me about yesterday?

Shoyru: What is this, an investigation?

Xilara: Precisely.

Shoyru: We are an integral part of the machinery business, providing the necessary obsidian for the support of the Moltaran economy. No surprises here. Well, I’d better get back to work.

Xilara: Would you mind if I interview some of your employees to get a better picture of how this quarry operates?

Shoyru: Erm, they’re a bit busy at the moment. Maybe you can come back another time. Have a great day!

Obsidian Quarry Worker: Hey boss, you got the obsidian packed? We are all ready to go to Terror Mountain to prepare for the – Oh, hi. I didn’t see you there. *cough* Er, sorry boss. Was looking at the order papers wrong. No need to pack any shipments to Terror Mountain. *nervous laughter*

Xilara: You have plans to take your work team to Terror Mountain? For what purpose could a group of magma Neopets want to spend time in the coldest place of Neopia… with obsidian?

Shoyru: All right. You caught us. We’ve been trying to keep this hush hush, but I guess I can share it with you. Look… We’ve been a bit disappointed with Moltaran athletics recently. Yooyuball is great and everything, but – pardon my pun – Moltara didn’t do so hot in last years Altador Cup.

Xilara: Go on…

Shoyru: We had this great idea. But we needed to test our hypothesis out using obsidian. Turns out, the shiny rock slides perfectly across ice and --

Obsidian Quarry Worker: -- now we’ve formed the first ever Ice Cave Curling team!!

Shoyru: …

Obsidian Quarry Worker: Sorry boss, I’m just too excited.

Xilara: This is incredible – please, tell me more.

Shoyru: Well, we’ve been traveling to the Ice Caves to further develop the game and actually, we happened to meet another unexpected team practicing in the ice caves. Mystery Island has impressively established their own Ice Cave Sledding team. We thought, “there’s so much potential here”.

Obsidian Quarry Worker: The Altador Cup - Yooyuball, Make Some Noise, Slushlie Slinger, and Shootout Showdown – all of it has been a classic in Neopia for ages. But imagine, ushering in a new era of Neopian sports!

Xilara: I had no idea.

Shoyru: Well, that’s the thing. No one does. We’ve been practicing in secret for ages, perfecting our techniques, getting ready to introduce Ice Cave Curling to all of Neopia.

Xilara: Let’s cut to the chase. You’ve developed a reputation as an angry Shoyru for those of us trying to collect obsidian.

Shoyru: I apologize – I can get a bit snippy. It’s just, we need all the extra obsidian we can get, between machinery and Ice Cave Curling development. We’re currently working on standardizing and regulating obsidian shape for it’s most ergonomic form.

Obsidian Quarry Worker: Don’t tell the Tonu at the Magma pool, but we’ve been sneaking by when he’s asleep to experiment with shaping the obsidian.

Shoyru: Tangor has been a great help as well, lending us his workshop occasionally. He’s tried to get involved himself, but somehow he always ends up creating a PetPet instead. They’ve become somewhat of a cheer squad though, which is nice.

Xilara: How have you kept this secret for so long?

Shoyru: We’ve been practicing in the Ice Caves specifically to reduce the risk of exposure before the sport is truly ready to be revealed. Usually threat of the menacing Snowager has been keeping visitors low. Although, some brave Neopets who have spotted us on their quest usually chalk it up to their mind going numb after being blasted by the Snowager. Really, who expects a team of fiery, magma Neopets sliding around obsidian in the coldest place on Neopia?

Xilara: Is there really room for this new sport in Neopia?

Shoyru: Room! You bring up a good point. We’ve discussed trying to re-purpose the Ice Arena to host tournaments as well as Battledome fights; however, we aren’t sure of the logistics yet. We’ve also considered the ice rink, but it seems there is some risk for the rink to melt at inconvenient places – or so we’ve heard from a Bruce that frequents the rink.

Obsidian Quarry Worker: Hey boss, we really better get going. We don’t want to delay practice any longer, plus the team wants to stop by Tyrannia en route to Terror Mountain. Apparently Jazzmosis is playing and Larry is a huge fan.

Xilara: Well, I'll let you guys get going. This certainly brings new insight and meaning into the inner workings of the Obsidian Quarry of Moltara. Best of luck!

Shoyru: Thanks. And don’t take any obsidian on your way out! I mean… please don’t take any more obsidian. As you know, it is very important to us.

There you have it, folks. Another mystery solved. Maybe next time, you should think twice about trying to take more than your fair share of obsidian.